**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
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