Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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