I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
