If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
