this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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