Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
