How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
