You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
