I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
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