Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
Randomize