just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
