big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
Randomize