if you like me you must not know who I am
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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