Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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