great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
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