I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
im on a boat
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