ya dads aren't the best wingmen
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
