I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
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