Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
I think people are normalizing furries
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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