? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Randomize
