I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
