ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Randomize
