I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
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