Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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