How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize
