I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize