do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Randomize
