In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
