Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
I have feelings that need drinking.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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