can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize