you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
