No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
