yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
