"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
