mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Randomize