So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
Randomize
