The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
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