Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
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