I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
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