he puts the penis in happiness.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
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