i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Randomize
