the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I got inside last night via doggy door
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
Randomize
