when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
