I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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