I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
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