I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Randomize