Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Randomize
