Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
