I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Randomize
