how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Randomize
